How I Met My Sweetheart

My good friend, Barb, at A Chelsea Morning asks “How Did You Meet Your Honey?” I’m a couple of days behind, but I thought I’d share, since so many of you have. I’ve enjoyed all the stories I’ve read so far.

I’ve mentioned before that Carl and I met online while playing trivia in a chatroom on MSN. I was separated, living in an apartment, and trying to save up enough money to file for divorce. I had moved out in July 2001 and had no social life apart from work and church. I had a few online friends, but no plans to ever meet any of them. It just wasn’t my thing. John, one of the guys I played trivia with, started paying more attention to me in late February 2002, asking all kinds of questions about my pending divorce. I thought it was kinda creepy, but I accepted his invitation to play Scrabble. I also let him know that I was not in the market, nor did I have any plans to start dating. Turns out, John was seeing Sue, but it wasn’t common knowledge among our trivia buddies. Carl and Sue had been friends for a few years, having met in one of the game rooms, and they played Scrabble quite often. Sue and John were in cahoots, playing matchmaker for Carl without his knowledge.

The four of us got together for a game, then the two of them left us alone to chat. We became very good friends over the course of the next few months, but dating was out of the question, for several reasons. The main reason was that I was still married, but even if I hadn’t been, we lived too far apart to consider it. I had told him about John’s interrogation, and he laughed that I thought it was creepy. We laughed that they thought we would even want to date. Really, only the desperate look for love online, right? We made fun of people who went online in search of dates.

He listened when I talked about my soon-to-be ex, and asked why I hadn’t already filed for divorce. I explained that I was saving up for a lawyer, and hoping in the meantime that my husband would clean up his act. He advised me to hang in there and work it out if it was at all possible to save the marriage. He had been through it, hated for anyone else to have to go through it, and did not recommend it. Unfortunately, my husband chose to continue womanizing, even placing ads online and hanging out at p*rn sites, all the while accusing me of all things sordid. After a year of separation, I filed for divorce.

We discussed our failed marriages and lessons learned, and agreed that it was best to just be friends. Three months later, I found out that my friend, Nikki, from Australia was coming to the States. She would be making the rounds, visiting several of us in our trivia group. I invited her to come visit me, and she accepted. Carl had said he would like to meet her, but he didn’t have a place for her to stay. We put our heads together, worked out a tentative date, and decided that the 3 of us should meet in Memphis. Two weeks after my divorce was final, Carl and I met in Memphis (he flew, I drove) for the weekend. It wasn’t a date, just a couple of friends getting together to have a good time. We didn’t have a good time, we had a wonderful time! We knew immediately that we would be more than just friends.

He was a gentleman and treated me with utmost respect. I’ve never met a more upstanding man. He had never been to Arkansas, so I offered to take him and show him around. We went to my apartment to freshen up, then we went to climb Pinnacle Mountain. He took me to dinner afterwards, and I offered to let him stay the night at my place. He agreed to go to church with me the next morning, then we went to visit my parents. We went for a walk in downtown Little Rock on Sunday evening before going back to my place for a home-cooked meal, then we settled on the sofa and laughed and talked and cuddled until we both fell asleep. I did most of the talking, which I’m sure is what put him to sleep. The next morning, we drove back to Memphis to meet Nikki’s flight and hang out with her until he had to catch his flight home.

We had so much fun in Memphis, sightseeing, shopping, and goofing off. He held my hand, opened doors for me, and wouldn’t let me pay for anything. In one of the music stores, he bought me two CD’s – Norah Jones and John Mayer. The instant we heard “Come Away With Me”, it became our song. When the time came to head to the airport, he was reluctant to go. He looked so sad. He had finally met the love of his life, and was having to leave her behind. He hugged and kissed me and promised to call as soon as he landed.

We talked daily by phone, email, instant messenger, or webcam – often all at the same time, and took turns flying to visit one another at least once a month. We dated long distance for a year and a half, and talked about getting married someday. When his mother proposed, I accepted. On March 9, 2004 my girls and I met him in Memphis for my birthday, and he presented me with a ring and an official proposal. We were married the next day in North Little Rock.



Filed under Family

17 responses to “How I Met My Sweetheart

  1. Blessed Beyond Measure

    I am sure you give people hope that sometimes online is a good place to meet that special someone. There are a lot of scary people out there, but some of them are just like you and me. Marrying someone who loves scrabble – what a catch!

  2. Grafted Branch

    So he wasn’t an axe-murderer or anything?! lol.

    Great story. Good to read you blogging again. πŸ™‚

  3. Dawn

    That must be the shortest official engagement on record. Great story! Thanks for sharing. I’m glad God is not in a box and can do marvelous things any way He chooses.

  4. Anonymous

    Let’s try this again….I just tried to leave a comment and got an error message that blogger didn’t support my http format, or some such gibberish…

    The most important thing is that you’re happy. There’s a lot of difference between this marriage and your first, ain’t there, my dear?

    I pray you’ll always be happy, my friend. πŸ™‚

  5. Anonymous

    That was me above. I had to post anonymously to get it to publish..


  6. Praying for your Prodigal

    No kidding! On Line! My brother in law met his wife on line as well…they are so happy!

    Thanks for sharing how you met.

    And-I’m so happy for you!


  7. Morning Glory

    Awwww, that was sweet. I’m glad you had a happy ending after all the pain from the first marriage. There is a perfect someone for everyone, I think.

  8. Barb

    Okay. Am I the only one who caught that? His mother proposed? Hee hee.

    You know, I think if you’re careful meeting online is becoming as natural as meeting anywhere else. A couple of other people who participated in this blogathon met on line and are as happy as you and Carl.

    I’m so glad you shared this with everyone. Might encourage a lonely heart out there to give it a chance. I’ve heard eHarmony is a great place to meet people.

    What I love most is that you finally met the man you were always meant to be with. I know you’re happy now.


  9. Barb

    Pssst. In your spare time πŸ™‚

    I have never figured out how to delete a bad link in a Mr. Linky. How did you do that? I mess up all the time when I link my post in other blogs.

    Really. In your spare time. So what are you doing right now?

  10. Big Mama

    This is a great story. Isn’t it amazing how being able to be online has changed lives?

  11. Lauren

    Really, really is a great story. how far of a drive is from Memphis to Little Rock? And flying once a month? Wow, you’ve done some traveling no haven’t you.

    So glad you’re happy! Do you still play games online or is that out of the question now? πŸ˜‰

  12. Brenda

    It’s almost 2 hours from Little Rock to Memphis. He drove over an hour to the Atlanta airport, then flew an hour to Memphis. It was as close to halfway as we could get.

    He still plays games online, but I have far more important things to do. Like blogging. ;~)

  13. Dawn

    Hi, Brenda. My daughter’s trying to get 125 comments on her 125th post. Could you pop over there and help her out? I’ve been missing your smiling face lately.

    Thanks for helping Kristen, if you can.

  14. Magi

    Wow, there are some strong similarities in our story. Glad to “meet” someone who else who met her husband online while playing games. πŸ™‚

  15. Tammy

    Great story, Brenda! As you know from reading mine, I met my hubby in a similar way…only more old-fashioned- a newspaper!

    But yes, that phrase stood out for me too…what’s up with his mother proposing and you accepting? Wish I knew the story behind that!

    Oh, and I have a very “normal” cousin who met his second wife (they both had kids) on the internet…and would you believe- she’s normal too! And they’re both attractive and smart! πŸ˜€

    What a wonderful love story Brenda!

  16. Shalee

    “When his mother proposed, I accepted.” I had to go back and read that a couple of times to get it…

    But it helps that he came and made it official.

    So happy that you found each other, no matter the avenue!

  17. Brenda

    Husband is taking issue with the “his mother proposed” comment. We knew right away that we would be together forever, but we weren’t going to marry until the kids were grown. Her “proposal” was asking “when are you getting married?” every time I talked to her, until I finally caved.

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